June 05, 2016

She takes selfies.

I do. And I am awfully happy about that. I used to hate my body. I used to hate almost everything about the way I looked. All I saw in pictures were flaws. Everywhere and in everything. All the failed pictures matching the perception I had of myself. Ugly. Not good enough. And then I started taking selfies. The beginning was shy and every picture made my heart beat a little bit faster. For only one successful frame the pictures taken were hundreds. Most of which completely awkward. As awkward as I felt. But all that was needed was that one. That one good one. One picture that could prove my outlook wrong. And all it took to find that one was to learn my angles. To recognise the right light. And the good ones started increasing and the process becoming more fun. I began to understand my body. Like strangers we met in the process of getting to know one another. Bit by bit, angle by angle - and soon I had fallen in love. (It's funny, as writing that triggers shame in me. Somewhere I fear that you who are reading this will find me full of myself. For loving myself...) Anyways, I had woken up to the fact that beauty is but in the angle one looks from. I had learnt to like myself - through looking at myself. I was now looking to find beauty - and had therefore found it. So without even realising, I had changed my whole outlook on life. And I was finally loving myself.

So thank god for selfies. And thank god I chose to not let the opinions or comments of others, the thoughts about selfies equalling narcissism or extreme vanity, shut me down. We are curious beings. That is our nature. We are meant to know ourselves. And we are meant to love ourselves. So for you who frown upon others taking selfies, I recommend you this: Try it. Give yourself a shot at finding yourself beautiful. Play with yourself, find your angle. Feel the freedom a good picture gives you. You do not need to post, simply keep it for yourself, as your own little secret. And I hope that through doing this, you will realise that a good selfie can be so much more than just vanity or a picture. It can be you finally looking at yourself through the eyes of your admirer. It can be a healthy romance between you and yourself. The beginning of a beautiful and happy relationship. For life.


Love (thyself),

Carolina


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