Worry never helped no one. But I worried for how they treated me. All the men that treated my badly. For all they took for granted. The good they did not see. The care they did not value. The worry they did not feel. Oh, the hours I spent swimming there. In the pool of being mistreated. I dove, I drowned, I fought to surface. Simply to drown again. I cried what felt like oceans. And I blamed it all on them. Until the ocean reflected in me the attire which I wore. Head to toe in diving gear. Beautiful snorkel and all. It was a sight not easy to see. That I had been the one there swimming. Equipped and ready to take some more, martyr cloak to make me tall. I did not choose to strip and rise, but to snorkel and dive and call it drown. For all the worry, all the blame, all the hours I spent there swimming. I used as grounds of escaping myself. My fear of walking on naked land.
Worry never helped nobody. But I worried for how they treated me. I swam in the pool of constant mistreatment. On a blissful holiday - away from myself.
Swimming in the ocean now.
Love,
Carolina
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